OK I'll be true to my word and keep this short as nothing really happened this week to go mental about so her it goes:
Crazy Man
Or should I just say crazy people I should try an generalise it to, The odd normal person. As the way the I see things Weirdo's currently outnumber Normals. (that's right normal people now referred to NORMAL'S). Having worked on a slow Tuesday one highlight was a crazy man that came into the shop.
How was he crazy?
Well
1. he came up to me said a few things shook my hand and then hugged me,
2. he then went to one of the chairs and kinda hobbled over it like it was some kind of climbing frame
and finally 3. he stood in one corner and started dancing what a crazy mo fo.
If you think this is a random occurrence you'd be wrong retail always seems to get random Weirdo's. What's even more funny is watching other people's reaction's to the Weirdo. For example they will stare but make sure it's from a distance and the minute the Weirdo makes eye contact. BAM!!! They feel like they gotta get out of there. I'll be honest I do the exact same thing, as on Tuesday after he was in the shop I had to go out on my lunch and I just happened to see him and guess what I did. Yep you guessed it I walked the other direction.
Foreign Customers.
OK, This can go either way just like dealing with everyday fellow country men or folk how ever you want to say it without seeming so BLOODY PC! Anyway today I dealt with a foreign customer I'm guessing Mediterranean and I must say she was very humble towards me once she bought the shoes. One thing I've notice between Foreign particularly European and Homeland (again not sure how to phrase it lol) customers is that they are extra grateful. It's when this happens you forget about all the tossers and lying bastards you dealt with before.
So what I'll say is that if your willing to be patient and not so bloody ignorant to a foreign person they will actually show you with a bit of respect. OK there's that language barrier but a few hand gesture's and by simply listening to will end up sorting out the situation.
So this goes out to all ignorant F**cker's, just because you speak a different language don't make you better than someone and just treat them how you would want to be treated.
That's all I got this week didn't really know what to say like it is probably because I didn't have to deal with any dickheads or tossers
Observation James
:-)
p.s Having a dartboard in the staff room is what dreams are made of!
Sunday 22 February 2009
Sunday 15 February 2009
Disabled children and the refund!!! Not forgeting the tosser!
It's that time of the week again Sunday night and I ain't got anything better to do. So what have I been up to this week and what Observations have I made. Well to be honest I can't really think of anything that stick's out or comes to mind part from going out on Thursday.
O what an eventful night it was, caution to all reader's this bit talks about sexual abuse.
I know, tough topic.
Well this is what happened I was out with a few mates having a laugh and drink in a bar and we notice these guys. They were full on tossers all drunk and acting up. Basically they were by these 2 girls being drunk and hassling them, me being me started doing a dance basically taking the piss out of the one of them.
WARNING. People of a sensitive nature DO NOT READ:
So I did the dance and out of nowhere I was STRADDLED by his mate, that's right he was humping my back. I was violated, I'm now a victim of rape, of the male kind. Do you know what was worse about 10 min later after my ordeal I go into the toilet for a piss and he just happens to be at the urinal. As I'm mid flow he looks at me and says:
"Alright"
A guy clearly not phased by dry humping another man. What has our society now come to!
OK now for your weekly dose of Retail life.
What's worse than having to deal with a refund other than a customer having to use her disabled child as an excuse to get her refund on the day.
That was the scenario I had on Saturday. A customer ordered some shoes off the Internet and didn't have the right documents and I said that I would not be able to look at the shoes until she got the right proof of purchase. Anyway she then starts to demand the refund that day. Then OK, This is the big THEN.
She says, (I'll put this bold capitals):
"I want my refund today, I can't come in any other day. I want my refund NOW! I don't want to have to come in again because (this may shock you what she says) of my DISABLED CHILD"
at that point I'm thinking what the fuck, you just didn't use your disabled son as an excuse. Now that truly is some messed up way of trying to get a refund.
So people next time you need to be prioritised just tell em a member of your family is disabled or better yet. I've got a slight gammy hand can I get a refund.
That's all from
Observation James
:-)
p.s nest time your in a night club, if you wanna pull don't square up to the girl like your gonna hit her. That is noway smooth or charming!
O what an eventful night it was, caution to all reader's this bit talks about sexual abuse.
I know, tough topic.
Well this is what happened I was out with a few mates having a laugh and drink in a bar and we notice these guys. They were full on tossers all drunk and acting up. Basically they were by these 2 girls being drunk and hassling them, me being me started doing a dance basically taking the piss out of the one of them.
WARNING. People of a sensitive nature DO NOT READ:
So I did the dance and out of nowhere I was STRADDLED by his mate, that's right he was humping my back. I was violated, I'm now a victim of rape, of the male kind. Do you know what was worse about 10 min later after my ordeal I go into the toilet for a piss and he just happens to be at the urinal. As I'm mid flow he looks at me and says:
"Alright"
A guy clearly not phased by dry humping another man. What has our society now come to!
OK now for your weekly dose of Retail life.
What's worse than having to deal with a refund other than a customer having to use her disabled child as an excuse to get her refund on the day.
That was the scenario I had on Saturday. A customer ordered some shoes off the Internet and didn't have the right documents and I said that I would not be able to look at the shoes until she got the right proof of purchase. Anyway she then starts to demand the refund that day. Then OK, This is the big THEN.
She says, (I'll put this bold capitals):
"I want my refund today, I can't come in any other day. I want my refund NOW! I don't want to have to come in again because (this may shock you what she says) of my DISABLED CHILD"
at that point I'm thinking what the fuck, you just didn't use your disabled son as an excuse. Now that truly is some messed up way of trying to get a refund.
So people next time you need to be prioritised just tell em a member of your family is disabled or better yet. I've got a slight gammy hand can I get a refund.
That's all from
Observation James
:-)
p.s nest time your in a night club, if you wanna pull don't square up to the girl like your gonna hit her. That is noway smooth or charming!
Monday 9 February 2009
Long distances and a Walking, Talking BRICK wall!
Hi all sorry bout the late blog normally due on a Sunday evening.
Actually keeping it up as well, check me out, skills to pay the bills. If only doing a blog paid the bills that is. Anyway your probably thinking what's with the title of this blog well seeing as we are coming up to valentine's and that I have a girlfriend that lives about 2 hours away from me by train I thought I'd talk about long distance relationships. Okay I've just come back from a weekend with the Mrs from her parents house up north. Whilst on the train I was thinking am I one of many or one of a few people to do the Long Distance relationship thing?
Well being with my Mrs a.k.a my girlfriend lol for over 2 years now (well not quite sure on dates as do people include when they were seeing each other or not lol). But anyway like I was saying we have been together this long with the majority of it being after uni, meant that we are having to be together with the distance factor involved. People often ask
"Do you find it difficult living so far away and not getting to see each other that often?"
The answer to that is yeah, of course I (we) find it hard as there are times when you want your other half with ya. There are times when you want to be all lovey dovey and shit lol and you cant really do that on your own. So what I'm trying to get at is that it is hard doing the long distance thing but it's well worth it when you do see each other. As you realise just spending that less amount of time with someone special can mean a lot more than spending a whole year with someone doing the same old shit and stuck in a routine. Hating the fact your with this person for all the wrong reasons.
Well that's the way I look at it anyway lol if you disagree or want to ask me anything else on this ask away.
Okay that was my lovey dovey valentine's section, bloody valentine's day what a whole bunch of bollocks. Why be so nice on 1 day when it should be all year round, Money grabbing bastards lol.
So you ask
"WALKING, TALKING BRICK WALL"
Well that would be me working in yep you guessed it RETAIL. You might realise there's an ongoing theme on my working life in retail lol. But man you kinda realise how retarded how people are. Here's an example of my latest encounters, when I ask a customer if they are OK. This is part of my job right, good customer service, blah blah blah and all that. What's annoying is when the customer does not even acknowledge that I've asked them a question. Okay fair enough they might not have heard so I'll ask again. But when they blatantly do and don't do fuck all. What am I, a brick wall. Bloody hell.
What's worst is when they just turn look at you and then don't do nothing but then turn the other way, what the fuck is that all about. Have you got a speech impediment. Bring a bloody interpreter with you next time, I might actually get to know what the hell you thinking. Man there are times when you ask the customer a lot of time's, I find myself doing it on purposes more than once till I get the fact the customer has acknowledged me. I'd rather a customer tell me to fuck off than just blank me, how bloody rude you ignorant fuck. lol.
I'll keep it short tonight anyway goodnight and take it easy all people
from observation James
:-)
p.s If you are a customer and the sales assistant asks you are you Okay please respond.
YOU IGNORANT F*CKERS!
p.p.s Sorry to the deaf people who have shopped and I was persistent in asking if you was Okay, I didn't realise you was deaf.
SORRY!
Actually keeping it up as well, check me out, skills to pay the bills. If only doing a blog paid the bills that is. Anyway your probably thinking what's with the title of this blog well seeing as we are coming up to valentine's and that I have a girlfriend that lives about 2 hours away from me by train I thought I'd talk about long distance relationships. Okay I've just come back from a weekend with the Mrs from her parents house up north. Whilst on the train I was thinking am I one of many or one of a few people to do the Long Distance relationship thing?
Well being with my Mrs a.k.a my girlfriend lol for over 2 years now (well not quite sure on dates as do people include when they were seeing each other or not lol). But anyway like I was saying we have been together this long with the majority of it being after uni, meant that we are having to be together with the distance factor involved. People often ask
"Do you find it difficult living so far away and not getting to see each other that often?"
The answer to that is yeah, of course I (we) find it hard as there are times when you want your other half with ya. There are times when you want to be all lovey dovey and shit lol and you cant really do that on your own. So what I'm trying to get at is that it is hard doing the long distance thing but it's well worth it when you do see each other. As you realise just spending that less amount of time with someone special can mean a lot more than spending a whole year with someone doing the same old shit and stuck in a routine. Hating the fact your with this person for all the wrong reasons.
Well that's the way I look at it anyway lol if you disagree or want to ask me anything else on this ask away.
Okay that was my lovey dovey valentine's section, bloody valentine's day what a whole bunch of bollocks. Why be so nice on 1 day when it should be all year round, Money grabbing bastards lol.
So you ask
"WALKING, TALKING BRICK WALL"
Well that would be me working in yep you guessed it RETAIL. You might realise there's an ongoing theme on my working life in retail lol. But man you kinda realise how retarded how people are. Here's an example of my latest encounters, when I ask a customer if they are OK. This is part of my job right, good customer service, blah blah blah and all that. What's annoying is when the customer does not even acknowledge that I've asked them a question. Okay fair enough they might not have heard so I'll ask again. But when they blatantly do and don't do fuck all. What am I, a brick wall. Bloody hell.
What's worst is when they just turn look at you and then don't do nothing but then turn the other way, what the fuck is that all about. Have you got a speech impediment. Bring a bloody interpreter with you next time, I might actually get to know what the hell you thinking. Man there are times when you ask the customer a lot of time's, I find myself doing it on purposes more than once till I get the fact the customer has acknowledged me. I'd rather a customer tell me to fuck off than just blank me, how bloody rude you ignorant fuck. lol.
I'll keep it short tonight anyway goodnight and take it easy all people
from observation James
:-)
p.s If you are a customer and the sales assistant asks you are you Okay please respond.
YOU IGNORANT F*CKERS!
p.p.s Sorry to the deaf people who have shopped and I was persistent in asking if you was Okay, I didn't realise you was deaf.
SORRY!
Sunday 1 February 2009
My second blog: Tossers, Glasses and Refunds
Crazy ain't it I'm actually gonna do another blog, man if I keep this up might just buy myself a pint. So it's been another week in the life of James Taylor, Mr Cynical if you've ever seen one or maybe just the guy who sees things as they should be.
Anyway seeing as a few people liked my last Blog I'll keep doing them but will keep em short especially as the last one was like a bloody letter lol. So What highlights have happened this week well....
I'm kinda sticking to my new year goals part from the gym one to be honest just could not be asked lol but everything else I've been sticking to so I'm happy bout that actually doing something with myself. Trying to stay clear from becoming a full on bum lol.
So what observations have I made this week I hear you all ask. For one does wearing non prescriptive glasses make you an automatic tosser or fanny magnet lol. Normally I would think of people that wear non prescriptive glasses were tossers but I have a pair. Why did I get em because of the pure reason because I like em and think they look good. OK I might sound like a hypocrite, but one time or another you'll slag someone off about something they own but one day you'll eventually succumb to it and join the trend whether it is in or not. Here's an example guys in cardigans. There was a stage where I thought man you bunch of tossers I felt so passionate about it that it took me about 3 years after the rage I finally thought fuck it I'll wear a cardigan. Do you know why I did just for the same reason as the Glasses because it looked good and I liked it. So no matter how much you try not to follow something it will happen no matter how much you want to be individual it will happen, it's just how you style them out.
OK back to the point of the glasses are they a fanny magnet? Well I went out on Thursday to a couple of bars with my mate's and I managed to get attention off girls not saying that I'm god's gift or anything like. But we're talking majority of girls in a club checking me out and one guy talking to me quite possibly a gay lol. Not sure if I stuck out like a sore thumb or had the thought that I always have about people and new trends......
"TOSSER" (Me in pic)
Then again one of my mate's I was with did say one of the girl's in the club said to her mate.
"that guy with the glasses, they really suit him"
So it leaves the question do these fake glasses bring unnecessary attention to an average guy, who thought they looked good and went with the style for the evening?
That's one question I can leave you to comment on. For those thinking I'm an egotistical prick I'm not just thought I'd write it and even if I was so what does it effect your life?
OK now moving onto the best part working in retail and the joys of dealing with customers.
today's subject:
People trying to get a refund.
That's right there is nothing worst than having to deal with a bloody return. OK there are fair enough reason to bring something back but man when they start going into extremes of trying to bring something back and make up stories to try and get there money back. These people are known as
Lying bastard's
I know it may sound harsh I'm just speaking out here as a working guy and a customer of retail. I'll explain what I mean when I mention that comment basically when a person brings a shoe back and has been unworn and you check em out and they look brand new fair enough, I'm more than happy to take em back. But when they come storming straight to the cash desk I would like a refund open the box then POW!!!! Worn down sole slightly smelly and mud in between the grooves of the sole and then they say OK you ready for this
"I haven't worn these, Could I get my money back"
OK, there's taking the piss and then there's yeah you work in retail so you must be a dumb ass. Do these people know we have probably more coming sense than half of the customers coming in asking about the sale when there's clearly signs everywhere (read previous blog you'll know what I mean). Customer's like that are the reason I write stuff like this up as we live in a place full of retards. What's worst is when the customer is adamant they didn't wear then. On that note I will have to finish this blog as I feel I maybe writing a tad too much lol.
Final note.....
Guys that roam shops trying to steal bags off a customer the public ain't afraid to speak up as I witnessed at work on Saturday as a thieving f*cker tried to take a customer's bag when she wasn't looking. With another customer noticing these actually told the guy to put the bag down, grabbing it off him and brought it to my attention at which point the guy went off in a hurry after putting the bag. So I solute the very few that randomly do acts of courage to do what is right.
Whhoooooooooo Yeahhhhhhhh!!! (that would be me cheering)
From Observation James
:-)
p.s If the Mrs reads this blog, I'll still wear the glasses lol!
Anyway seeing as a few people liked my last Blog I'll keep doing them but will keep em short especially as the last one was like a bloody letter lol. So What highlights have happened this week well....
I'm kinda sticking to my new year goals part from the gym one to be honest just could not be asked lol but everything else I've been sticking to so I'm happy bout that actually doing something with myself. Trying to stay clear from becoming a full on bum lol.
So what observations have I made this week I hear you all ask. For one does wearing non prescriptive glasses make you an automatic tosser or fanny magnet lol. Normally I would think of people that wear non prescriptive glasses were tossers but I have a pair. Why did I get em because of the pure reason because I like em and think they look good. OK I might sound like a hypocrite, but one time or another you'll slag someone off about something they own but one day you'll eventually succumb to it and join the trend whether it is in or not. Here's an example guys in cardigans. There was a stage where I thought man you bunch of tossers I felt so passionate about it that it took me about 3 years after the rage I finally thought fuck it I'll wear a cardigan. Do you know why I did just for the same reason as the Glasses because it looked good and I liked it. So no matter how much you try not to follow something it will happen no matter how much you want to be individual it will happen, it's just how you style them out.
OK back to the point of the glasses are they a fanny magnet? Well I went out on Thursday to a couple of bars with my mate's and I managed to get attention off girls not saying that I'm god's gift or anything like. But we're talking majority of girls in a club checking me out and one guy talking to me quite possibly a gay lol. Not sure if I stuck out like a sore thumb or had the thought that I always have about people and new trends......
"TOSSER" (Me in pic)
Then again one of my mate's I was with did say one of the girl's in the club said to her mate.
"that guy with the glasses, they really suit him"
So it leaves the question do these fake glasses bring unnecessary attention to an average guy, who thought they looked good and went with the style for the evening?
That's one question I can leave you to comment on. For those thinking I'm an egotistical prick I'm not just thought I'd write it and even if I was so what does it effect your life?
OK now moving onto the best part working in retail and the joys of dealing with customers.
today's subject:
People trying to get a refund.
That's right there is nothing worst than having to deal with a bloody return. OK there are fair enough reason to bring something back but man when they start going into extremes of trying to bring something back and make up stories to try and get there money back. These people are known as
Lying bastard's
I know it may sound harsh I'm just speaking out here as a working guy and a customer of retail. I'll explain what I mean when I mention that comment basically when a person brings a shoe back and has been unworn and you check em out and they look brand new fair enough, I'm more than happy to take em back. But when they come storming straight to the cash desk I would like a refund open the box then POW!!!! Worn down sole slightly smelly and mud in between the grooves of the sole and then they say OK you ready for this
"I haven't worn these, Could I get my money back"
OK, there's taking the piss and then there's yeah you work in retail so you must be a dumb ass. Do these people know we have probably more coming sense than half of the customers coming in asking about the sale when there's clearly signs everywhere (read previous blog you'll know what I mean). Customer's like that are the reason I write stuff like this up as we live in a place full of retards. What's worst is when the customer is adamant they didn't wear then. On that note I will have to finish this blog as I feel I maybe writing a tad too much lol.
Final note.....
Guys that roam shops trying to steal bags off a customer the public ain't afraid to speak up as I witnessed at work on Saturday as a thieving f*cker tried to take a customer's bag when she wasn't looking. With another customer noticing these actually told the guy to put the bag down, grabbing it off him and brought it to my attention at which point the guy went off in a hurry after putting the bag. So I solute the very few that randomly do acts of courage to do what is right.
Whhoooooooooo Yeahhhhhhhh!!! (that would be me cheering)
From Observation James
:-)
p.s If the Mrs reads this blog, I'll still wear the glasses lol!
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